In Honor of my Daddy's Recent Trips to the Hospital

First, I want to thank everyone for their prayers.  Unfortunately, things didn't go as planned.  The medical team worked on daddy for about 2 hours but couldn't fix his blockages, so now he is going to have to have more surgery in the coming weeks.  Once again, I will be asking for prayers in the near future.  However, I thought I would go ahead and post the following:

Laughter is the Best Medicine

These one-liners were taken from actual doctor notes on patient charts. Think we are in trouble?

• I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
• She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
• Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
• Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
• Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch. 
• Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
• On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared.
• The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

• Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
• Healthy-appearing decrepit 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
• The patient refused an autopsy.
• The patient has no past history of suicides.
• Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
• The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant, with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.
• Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. 
• She is numb from her toes down.
• The skin was moist and dry.
• When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room

 

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Happy Anniversary to Jack & Debbie!